Doctor Who (2005) Season 11 Episode 01

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So here we have the first proper episode of Jodie Whittaker as the 13th Doctor. Dare you to be a bad enough dude to read my opinions on it after the jump?

I won’t dally. It was a plodding episode. I could hardly pay it much attention. I mean, there wasn’t anything offensive about it. There wasn’t anything to it at all, really. There’s no clever riddle of a plot that the Doctor had to figure out. The Doctor’s not particularly eccentric or bombastic. About the only thing that’s clever is that she has a Sonic Switchblade, which is pretty pointless until you realize that it’s probably to avoid giving her a prop that was sure to invite comparisons to a dildo.

I mean, regardless of whether the Sonic Screwdriver would have been like the tiny pressure gauge of the 10th or the lightsaber handle of the 11th, it would still have been pointed out as being a dildo. Going the switchblade path was clever. You maintain the handheld nature of the Sonic Device, while avoiding the awesomeness of the 12th’s Sonic Shades that people apparently hated.

And in case you’re wondering, no, they don’t really make a big deal that the Doctor’s got a pussy now. About the only real reference is a bit where she apparently has a better nose for time… odors, or whatever. Because you know, women are always smelling something stinky, so their sense of smell’s better, or something. Amirite?

Attempted offensive misogyny aside, yeah, there’s nothing particularly good or bad about this episode. It’s kinda just… there. And you know what? I’ll take it. At least it’s just mediocre as opposed to fucking terrible like the Clara seasons. The Doctor may have a cunt now, but at least she isn’t a cunt (as of this episode). So I’m fine with it. I’ll probably follow the season out of habit. Who knows, it could turn out terrific.

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