2020

Hello there. I was going to make a new blog and post this. But then I thought, nah, I should do something click-baity if I’m going to do something new. Like, Mandalorian Season 1 (What they won’t tell you). But then I got lazy and decided to just use my old blog instead. So we’re back to this post that I originally wrote. Fair warning, it’s not a toy thing. It, or rather, at least one of the 2 follow-ups to it, may have some “heavy” content. Going forward, this blog’s probably going to have more stuff than just toy reviews. We’ll see.

So here’s the thing, my resolution for 2020 was to start this blog and write at least one thing a week. And it could be about anything too. From musings to character & story ideas to toy, show & movie reviews. The objective’s to get me back into the writing groove that I’ve left behind for so long. And hey, it’s not exactly a tough resolution to meet, is it? Easy peasy. Not only did I already have an idea for what I want to write for the first post, but inspiration struck, so I even wrote this internal monologue thing for a character.

Which totally screwed me up because it ended up being pretty dang therapeutic and/or cathartic, so I kinda lost the drive already. I mean, no one is ever supposed to fulfill their resolutions right?

Yeah, slippery slope there. Which is why I’m writing this now, to avoid failing before I even start. What you’ve read up to here, is a sort of preface. The real stuff’s about go down. Also, I can’t promise it’ll be family friendly language from here on out. I don’t swear in real life, at all. But I cuss where I feel it appropriate in my writing. And I have no fucking clue if the shit I’m about to write will have any no-no words. So do follow me as I reveal unto you, a secret of life! Like some renegade magician spilling the magic beans.

Okay, you ready for this? The secret of life, and I’m not gonna prolong this. I’m not gonna tease this revelation and milk the anticipation. I’m gonna tell it to you straight, and then backtrack to explain the nuances and intricacies of this secret of life. Because otherwise it’s fucking annoying, especially if the secret turns out to be a letdown *winkysmileyface*.

The secret of life is simply thus: The secret of life, is to live. Because goddamn! There’s so much to fucking live for.

Alright, now that I’ve let the cat out of the bag and you’re thoroughly unimpressed by this so-called Secret of Life, let me expand on my statement and explain how I’ve come to this conclusion. Seriously, it’s like going into the job market for the first time, no one ever tells you this stuff. In fact, I had an idea to write a short book on what it’s like to work for the first time. Though I’ll probably just eventually spill the beans in this blog instead. But for now, let’s digress no further and return to the matter at hand. Which is the Secret of Life. Please, bear with me.

Now, when I say Secret of Life, I don’t necessarily mean THE secret of life. This is just one of life’s potentially many secrets, and it’s a secret because no one ever told me about it. I had to find out on my own, by, y’know, being alive. Not necessarily living, because that implies I have a life, but simply through the act of being alive. And it’s not even necessarily a secret that’s been around for a particularly long time. If you think about it, it wasn’t all that long ago when parents first started having the hope, yea the expectation, that their children will lead better lives than them. Up until fairly recently, there’s really not much difference in the standard of living and the level of opportunities afforded to the regular person on the street, from one era, to the next. Like, if you were a peasant in the 10th century, your life’s not that much different from a peasant in the 8th century, or even one from the 12th century. Now, I don’t know how old you are or which part of the world you’re from, but consider this. If your dad was a doctor, do you think there would be sort of an expectation for you to follow in his footsteps? Or if your family runs a small business, would you expect to take over one day? Okay, let’s turn it around. If you know someone who is an accountant and you heard their kid is about to go to college, would you kind of expect their kid to go into accountancy as well?

I mean, in this day and age, we really shouldn’t expect kids to necessarily follow in their parents footsteps, but that mindset’s still there. It’s the mindset of not just ancient man, but fairly recent man. Like, maybe as recently as your parents or as far back as your great grandparents. The idea of the next generation, following in the footsteps of the current generation.

But what if the parents had a “bad” job? What if the dad is a janitor and the mom is a cashier at a local supermarket? In this scenario, you would hope for the sake of their family, that the kid would “level up” and at least get a cushy office job right? I mean, especially if he’s able to go to college, whereas his parents probably never did. And that’s where it’s kinda weird y’know? The hope and perhaps even expectation, that the next generation will lead a better life than the previous one.

All my life, I thought it was the way of things that the next generation should do better than the last. But, I’ve also seen a lot of contradictions to that belief. When I was younger I kept hearing from my parents about how so-and-so’s kid got this high paying job and was making a ludicrous amount of money and was having so much success. But then I entered the job market and I was making a fraction of what I heard those other kids were making, despite the fact that I started off with a pretty cushy job at a really huge company. And then as time went on, I realized… hey, no one who wasn’t higher management was making that crazy amount of money. Not mid-management, not long time staff (with a few exceptions), and certainly not any new guy who’s just entering the industry and wasn’t enjoying a healthy dose of nepotism.

So then I started looking into history. Now, I’m an utter layman as it pertains to history, but one of the wonders of our time is that we can look up on a whole LOT of information through just a few clicks or swipes. And according to the internet, Thomas Crapper patented the valve-and-siphon design in 1891 and refrigerators for home use were not invented until 1913. That’s just mind blowing. This means that in our grandparents or great grandparents’ generation, you couldn’t take a Thomas Crapper, lightly push down on a lever, and then have all your bodily wastes just magically flushed away. Think about that, the next time you look at your grandparents. Know that their parents, had to do their business, au naturel and probably with no running water.

As recently as my own childhood, corporal punishment was seen as A-OK. My dad was never into it. But I’ve been caned by teachers and my mum so much that until I reached adulthood, I thought it was the right and proper thing for a child to be whipped. Not even a misbehaving child mind you. As a kid, I was pretty much an angel and I still got whipped. So when corporal punishment was going out of fashion, I actually thought the parents were spoiling their kids and treating them like snowflakes. Now though? Yeah, I think it’s an abhorrence.

Oh, and for those who may be curious, there were 3 levels of whipping back when I was a kid. The normal whipping, which was unpleasant but can be grown accustomed to, especially if there’s a teacher who’s a bit too fond of the cane. The caning that leaves a red welt even through your clothes. That’s for more serious transgressions. And of course, there’s the skin breaking caning that’s usually reserved for the chronic troublemaker.

So now that I’ve seemingly digressed entirely from the SECRET OF LIFE, let’s bring it all back. My point is, this secret of life, isn’t necessarily something that’s been around for that long. It’s a fairly recent thing that the absolute splendors that permeate our world, is available to so many people and probably available to you, my dear reader, assuming you’re still reading this. It wasn’t until pretty recently that we could start expecting that the next generation, would have a shot at a better life than the current generation. It’s so recent that people still kind of expect kids to follow in their parents’ footsteps, particularly if the parents already had “good” jobs. Our great grandparents, probably had no refrigerators. Imagine not having the simple pleasure of having a cold drink on a hot day. In fact, I’ve only now just realized, that that’s probably why my grandparents only ever drank lukewarm drinks. It’s because they never got used to drinking cold water in their own youth. I mean, my dad loves cold drinks and he’s now nearly their age when I was a kid. It’s because he got to enjoy cold water when he was younger.

Before I go further off tangent; now that I’ve established that this secret of life is a new thing that mostly applies to our current generations, let’s move on to some more points as I explain to you, dear reader, my take on this mind blowing secret… in a future post. That I’ll write now but post later because dang, we’re already at 1600 words and that’s not bad, for having no real drive when I started writing this. So stay tuned, because seriously, no one fucking tells you this stuff.

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